You and I are like the sun and the moon.
Destined to entice millions of eyes, inspire billions of poems and be the dream delicately dripped between two lover’s lips… yet never trusted to be together.
Because I am peace and you are war and we will forever be enigmatic opposites.
And despite the aching attraction I feel pull me towards you with all the magnetic force in this universe, I am destined to remain your friend.
To teeter endlessly on that glass edge between platonic and unconditional love.
To continue to hold my breath when you speak and fruitlessly attempt to slow my heartbeat when you smile, because like the moon and the sun I will spend my life trying to defy physics and the laws of nature to be with you.
Even if only to gently pinch at the strings of the guitar that is your heart.
And I am afraid.
Because although I’ve spent weeks trying to prove to myself that you are not the sun. Your hair is not the definition of spun gold. Your eyes are not two oceans in the middle of a storm, lightning flashing with each blink. You are not my safety net. Your jawline does not resemble a rocky mountain peak. Your eyelashes do not kiss your cheek when you blink and your lips do not curve when you speak.
But I can’t.
Because you are war and I am peace and you are the epitome of beauty.
Your features are not carved in the likeness of any god but are instead formed from the crevices my fingers trail, day after day.
And I’m sorry.
Because despite hearing it and knowing it and feeling it reflected in your eyes when you look at me.
I can’t help it. I don’t want to be your friend.
I want to fall head first over the edge into the light. To walk the same wavelength, you emit.
Because I am peace and you are war and I’ve travelled for too long with peaceful men to know I need the fire from the sun to warm the darkness in my bones.
And yet I know.
There can be no peace in war and no war in a time of peace so I’ll take what I can get.
And settle for the lukewarm fire in others minds, so long as I get to keep you as my friend.
For there is a long road ahead of me, many miles more than I have already walked and I need you.
For the possibility of war is what keeps my peace.